Dear Christine,
THE PAST two years have been a nightmare and even now I am still trying to find my way through what seems like a maze.
I was under severe pressure due to family matters and started to get angry with everyone close to me, including my boyfriend, whom I pushed away. We were planning to get married.
By the time I was able to think more clearly again, my boyfriend had started seeing someone else. I also met another person who said he was in love with me and wanted to get married. He was very helpful in my time of need, giving me the emotional support I wanted there and then.
However, my former boyfriend, whom I thought was quite happy with his new lover, told me he was not happy at all, and that he wanted me back. He said she wanted to get married and while he felt a bit obligated, he wanted to marry me.
He said I was the one who pushed him out of my life and while he tried to find happiness with this other person, it just did not work out. I also realised that as much as I admire and appreciate what this other guy has done for me, it’s my first boyfriend who I really love and care for. Please tell me what to do.
– P.F.
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Dear P.F.,
I’m still waiting to see what is the problem here – apart from the fact that you and your first boyfriend were too quick to form relationships after you pushed him away.
You have both tried to find happiness with other people and realised it has not worked. Thank God neither of you went so far as to actually marry someone else.
Now that you’ve found your way back to each other, make a decision about which direction you want your lives to go. From where I sit, you both want to be with each other, and that’s fine.
For sure, it’s going to hurt the other two parties involved, but you won’t be hurting them nearly as much as you would if you married them while caring for each other.
I hope it won’t be long from now when I’ll be getting another letter from you telling me you’ve set the wedding date or that you’ve just had a glorious honeymoon.
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– CHRISTINE
