Dear Christine, I am a woman of quite a few problems. You see I’m a bad judge of character.
I say that because almost all the men I have dated have abused or battered me in one form or another. Be it punching, kicking, mentally, emotionally and even sexually. At this moment I feel like a pack of bread on a shelf that everyone squeezes, but never wants.
You see Christine, some years ago, I met a guy, he was nice in the beginning or so I thought. He smokes that “mind altering” stuff, while drinking a mixture of Hennessy, Magnum and Guinness. He then wants to do ungodly things to you. Things that make you afraid and ashamed to look in a mirror because the face staring back looks familiar, but you wonder who are you.
Christine, people that read this would want to know why I put up with him, but I thought my love for him could make him see he was hurting me. In our relationship, there were other women. I was assured that because he was my junior and I was dedicated to him every which way he would stop.
But I was wrong. He left me for someone else. I was with him for nine years. Never once cheated. How can he do that to me? I don’t have any diseases or anything of the sort. But do you know how I feel? After all of that we still made love. I don’t want another man. I am terrified.
My body has so much bruised blood, so much aches and pains, emotional scars. He even once raped me after a night of mixed drinks and partying with his friends. I told him I was going to the police, but he said he couldn’t get in trouble for that – I’m his woman.
Christine, there are things I would not mention because he would know it’s him. I once complained to the police for him and one of them told him. So I never did it again. I sometimes feel like ending my pain.
I am physically, emotionally, psychologically scared and drained. I can’t do this anymore. Can I get some feedback from your readers? – IN A WORLD BY MYSELF
DEAR IN A WORLD BY MYSELF: I do hope you get some constructive feedback from readers. I am not sure what I can tell you that would make you feel better.
I’d like to say –STAY as far away from this man as possible. But from what you say. I don’t think you know how. Whatever happens, do not end the pain in the way I think you mean.
You need to think of all the bad things this man has done to you, and you will see why you must stay clear of him for you own good health – mental and otherwise. If you’d like to talk to someone who will listen and try to help you through – call the crisis centre hotline at 435-8222.
– CHRISTINE
