Dear Nesta,
When I read ’bout all de blizzards an’ snowstorms cripplin’ de norf at Chris’mas-time, I know you got to be up dey freezin’, an’ wonderin why yuh en down hey in de sun! Well, I in de sun, not freezin’, but fumin’!
Two nights ago, a frien’ phone to say she din sure, but she t’ink she see somebody lookin’ like me ’pon Facebook yawnin’ off duh head! At firs’ I t’ought she could only be jokin’, ’cause I c’n see which body woulda got dah nerve, firs’, to tek my photo widout sayin’ somet’ing, an’ secon’, to put it ’pon Facebook!
After studyin’ back, I remember I went to a party Chris’mas Eve night, an’ one or two people was walkin’ ’bout tekkin’ photos. How de devil I was to know dat my picture would soon be up ’pon Facebook, tellin’ de whole worl’ whey I was? Suppose de police was lookin’ fuh muh – which, of course, duh wasn’t – but suppose it was so?
In two two’s duh woulda been able to clap duh han’s ’pon muh! An’ de nex’ t’ing, mos’ random shots ketchin’ anybody unawares, don’ come out good a-tall, sometimes when yuh see de final result, yuh want to crawl in a hole an’ disappear. Yuh pickin’ yuh nose, or yuh en get yuh han’ to yuh mout’ fas’ enuff to stifle a yawn an’ yuh get ketch wid yuh mout’ open! Anyt’ing could happen!
As you know, Ness, I like my privacy, so I en got to tell yuh how blue vex I was to t’ink somebody woulda had de gall to invade my space an’ put muh ’pon Facebook! But when I check, I breave a sigh o’ relief ! It wasn’t me! It appear to me dat people rights fas’ disappearin’ dese days! Y’mean, I en got no say a-tall ’bout wevver or not my own photo should or should not go ’pon Facebook? I promise to ax a question wevver de Police cyhan do neffin ’bout t’ings like dis! Facebook is now de craze, not only in Buhbayduss, but all ovuh de worl’! Millions o’ people ’pon it all day long!
Evahbody got hundruds o’ frien’s!! De slightes’ t’ing happen – up ’pon Facebook! Now, yuh could use dis site fuh good but also fuh bad. De good part is dat yuh could use it fuh advertisin’ reasons – ef yuh got a business, yuh sellin’ somet’ing, or yuh tryin’ to fin’ a long-los’ frien’, t’ings like dat. But, ’pon de ethuh han’, ef somebody don’ like yuh, you know hummuch damage duh could cause?
Get one o’ you photos an’ “doctor” it, so it en’ up wid you face an’ somebody else body, maybe in a pose dat would curl yuh hair, an’ den put it up ’pon Facebook fuh all to see. You could fret an’ fume all yuh like, but dey won’ be one bless-ed t’ing yuh could do ’bout it!
But Facebook en de only way people now feel duh could intrude in yuh life. Wuhevuh function yuh atten’ nowadays – from funerals back down – yuh cyhan seem to escape de camera! Wevver professional or home-grown cellphone, out duh come an’ de clickin’ start! How come we get so “camera” conscious? I us-ed to hear ’bout “camera-shy” people but sence dis new age o’ cellphones wid cameras, it should now change to “camera-mad”.
Philomena was at a open-air tea party some while back, an’ howevuh much she turn she head to get ’way from de wretch-ed camera, somebody was clickin’ away! It mek she lose she appetite! Tourisses was stoppin’ by too, wid duh evuhlastin’ camera, as ef we ’pon show! Imagine, people she en know from Adam, now could show ’bout she photo when duh get home, an’ describin’ “our marvellous visit to the Islands”!
Days o’ privacy done! All we rights gine t’rough de eddoes! Help!
Tek care o’ yuhself, Yuh frien’ Babsie.
