HOW YUH GINE, dear heart? De cole wevver easin’ up li’l bit as yet? I know you-all had a hard time dis las’ winter an’ I hope t’ings now t’awin’ out fuh wunna.
Chile, week befo’ las’ we had a real scare when anethuh cave open up in de same area as de las’ one in 2007. You mus’ remember dah sad time when a whole fambly los’ duh life when duh house collapse one night – de groun’ jes open an’ swallow up evuht’ing. It seem it was a big cave onderneaf dat house. Now, neffin like dah en happen dis time, but we cyhan deny de fack dat we got anethuh cave in de same area. I hear dey en anyt’ing to fear, but I doubt yuh would ketch me or any fambly o’ mine livin’ out dey; my nerves won’ be able to stan’ dah type o’ tes’. It could be a matter o’ hey today an’ gone tonight.
Philomena an’ muhself was discussin’ how it seem as ef de earf crackin’ up, an’ dese caves now appearin’ all o’ a sudden, but I had to p’int out dat dese is de physical cracks de eye could see, but wuh ‘bout all de ethuh types o’ cracks dat openin’ up an’ we en noticin’ dem.
I start off by axin’ ef she en see wuh happenin’ to de Wes’ Indies cricketers. Dem jes’ get back from de 2011 Cricket Worl’ Cup after a mos’ disapp’intin’ performance. I en know wuh gone wrong wid dah lot; I only know dat in spite o’ all de changes o’ dis an’ dat coach, droppin‘ dis body an’ puttin’ in de nex’, dat team simply cannot get goin’. Dem crack up far wors’ dan Humpty Dumpty an’ jes like he, it gine need mo’ dan de king’s horses an’ men to put dem back togedduh agen. I us-ed to be one o’ duh bigges’ fans, but I get disapp’int so of’en, dat I hardly know when an’ whey duh playin’ dese days. Nobody don’ seem to know wuh to do to get dem movin’ agen.
We cricketers been crackin’ up fuh some time, but wuh ’bout de recent cracks dat been appearin’ in de Labour Party? Evuh sence dah game o’ “musical chairs” when Mia c’n fin’ a chair to sit in when de music stop, an’ Owen get push, ’gainst ’e will, in de chair at de top o’ de table, t’ings been lookin’ li’l rocky. An’ lookout, “Li’l Caesar” – ’e get dah name from my frien’ “Lou” – seem to be ’pon de move. He talkin’ loud an’ strong in favour o’ de ethuh side, but we mus’ wait an’ see wuh gine happen.
Y’know, I jes’ love how politicians behave. Duh could jump hey an’ jump dey wifout brekkin’ stride. It seem to be all in a day’s wuk. One minute duh bewzin’ duh opponents; de nex’, ovuh de fence duh go an’ lan’ ’pon de ethuh side, tryin’ to chat up de same people duh jes’ done bewzin’. Dah mus’ tek some gall. I waitin’ to see ef he gine lan’ in any open arms or ef he jump short an’ gine fine ’eself out in no man’s lan’.
Philomena jes’ p’int out she t’ink she see a li’l hairline crack appearin’ between we Guvment an’ Jamaica own, ’bout some female visitor dat was tryin’ to visit de islan’ an’ get turn back, but I tell she I only hope she jes imaginin’ t’ings, ’cause dis really en de time fuh de Caribbean islan’s to pick at one aneduh, jes try an’ keep CSME in min’. It would be a real shame ef dis crack open up an’ become a problem an’ turn into somet’ing too big fuh li’l “tea an’ sympat’y” to put back togedduh. Ef yuh don’ deal wid cracks when duh firs’ appear, yuh could fin’ yuhself in a deep hole.
Tek care o’ yuhself, Yuh frien’ Babsie
