On any given afternoon you can spot Christopher Alleyne on the road doing pick-ups for his two sons, one-year-old Christopher Nathaniel and three-year-old Tyler Alexander. This doting father admits that the afternoons are his favourite parts of the day because he gets to see and spend time with them.
Christopher, who considers himself a single dad, relishes fatherhood and admits that at age 42, it is the best thing that could have happened to him.
“Money-wise, health-wise and time-wise fatherhood gives you a new perspective on life related to investments, how you spend your time, and even the value of sleep,” he said laughing.
“It’s just a change of perspective but it changes your whole outlook and teaches you about yourself as well.”
One thing Christopher admits is that at times he sounds just like his parents when he is dealing with his boys.
“I guess that I am my dad and my mother to my sons,” he said. “When I deal with them I now see characteristics of my own parents in me. My mother was very stern, but my father would more use psychology.”
Unlike his parents who were married, Christopher is not, but he is determined to have a strong family environment for his children.
“I am not married and there are two mothers and I have the kids with me most of the time,” Christopher said.
“I find that I can handle them anytime very well and I bring them by me for long periods of time. I am very hands-on with the pampers and milk, and I like knowing what the children need.”
Since both boys are still young, Christopher has to be very attentive to things like sleeping through the night, wanting milk or disrupted sleep patterns, but for him it is par for the course.
“My dad was very hands-on with me,” he adds. “It wasn’t like you give the mother the money and then you don’t know what’s going on in the child’s life. I know when they’re going to get up in the night so I just prepare myself in advance.”
Although Chrisopher spends most of his time with the boys, their mothers are still very integral to their upbringing.
“I make sure the mothers are involved in the kid’s lives. I believe that even though the parents are not together, the children should spend time with both parents,” he said.
“With us the relationship is maintained so that there is harmony. Sometimes there are differences of opinion, but you have to keep the children as the primary focus.
“It was difficult for me breaking up with the mother, but it’s something you have to deal with and put the child first. For me I have to put my emotions aside. The mothers maintain communication as we have to talk about the nursery, doctor’s visits and so there’s constant communication. I always make sure they are involved in the day to day decisions.”
But watching Christopher interact with his two sons and seeing their connection to him, it’s clear that he’s making a positive impact in their lives and they in his as well.
Christopher hopes that the lessons he is trying to teach and nurture in them at this early stage will take root as they grow older.
“I would like for them to be confident and sure of themselves,” he says. “I don’t want them to spend their life trying to fit in. I want them to be bold and able to assert themselves and not to feel fearful of anyone, as long as they’re respectful.”
