A MAN CALLED lambasting Barbadian women and calling them hypocrites.
His anger came as a result of being “dissed”, as he put it, by a woman who was all over him two nights earlier at a fete at Kensington Oval.
He said that night she “did the dog” with him and his buddy. They drank together and talked, but she declined to give them her number and only promised to meet up with them at another fete.
He was pleasantly surprised to see the same woman in church the Sunday morning.
“I called her by her name, but she just looked at me nasty, and didn’t say anything. That was something else,” he said.
The caller said she behaved like a typical Bajan woman.
His thoughts were the basis of this week’s question: are women who “wuk-up and do bad” at fetes, but are otherwise very reserved, being hypocrites or are they just being typical Bajan women?
The overwhelming response we received tells us we struck a nerve, as many suggested this was typical behaviour. I will let the responses speak for themselves, but I can tell you that in the years I attended Trinidad Carnival and countless fetes there, this was the behaviour I also encountered.
So it’s not a “typical Bajan” woman thing.
The following are the edited versions of responses:
-“They are hypocrites! I know one personally who’s on Facebook ‘skinning out and doing bad’, but on Sunday morning she’s in church.
“How can you serve two Gods, yet have the heart to invite people to church and be bold-faced to tell them to change their ways? It’s not right!”
-“It’s not just a ‘Bajan’ thing; it applies to women everywhere. Sometimes we women just need a moment to be someone other than who we are all the time. When else do you get the opportunity to let your hair down?”
-“They are just being typical Bajans and should not be viewed as hypocrites. When the sweet music hits, it is hard to stand still. I, too, was a very shy and reserved young lady back in the day, but when the beat was on, my legs and body had a mind of their own. Of course I would only “wuk-up” when my friends were around and never in front of my parents. Wukking up is not just a Bajan thing; it’s a Caribbean thing that trickled down from Africa. It is culture.”
-“As long as a woman is not denying what she does and looking down on others for doing the same thing, she is not a hypocrite.”
-“It is not what you do – it’s how you do it. There are many ways to dance and enjoy yourself without skinning out with men between your legs, and sandwiched between two men all on de ground. That is not called for. There’s a difference between dancing and vulgarity on a dance floor.”
-“Wukking up is part of our culture and anywhere with African ancestry and even in Africa itself people dance that way. Yes, there are some moves that women do that are not graceful, but there is nothing wrong with letting the music make you do your thing. Like Bob Marley said, “One thing about music – when it hits you, you feel no pain.” You’re only a hypocrite if you speak against something and next thing you’re on BajanTube skinning out.
“As far as wukking-up and going to church, please! I wuk-up at parties with my mate and we go to church every Sunday. There is no hypocrisy because the Bible don’t talk about wukking up. Come on, people; there’s a time and a place for everything.”
-“You can and should be reserved and ladylike always, but when it comes to a fete you can let loose. That’s what partying is all about. Unfortunately, some women cannot or don’t know how to exercise self-control in dance. But if they attend church, so what? That does not make them hypocrites.”
-“I don’t remember being told in church that going to a fete is a sin. So, ladies, when the music hits you, wine and wuk it, but remember when you get home don’t forget to pray before you go to bed.”
-“It is our culture and if you deny that, then you’re denying yourself.”
-“People use the word ‘culture’ as an excuse to be downright slack! Sure, wukking-up is a part of our ‘culture’, but ‘skinning out’ and being lewd do not fall into that bracket. It’s about self-respect and knowing how far is too far. You can only be considered a hypocrite if you condemn a certain type of behaviour and then engage in it.”
-“Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian, just like standing in a garage doesn’t make you a car.”
-“. . . Even senior citizens shake a leg when the music sweets them up. Nobody criticizes people in some churches for clapping their hands and breaking into dance to the point where they go in to a mad stagger, or what is called going into the spirit. What is the difference [between that and] going into the spirit at a fete, especially when the music is real sweet?
-“There will come a time when those who wuk-up and call themselves Christians will have to make a choice. You are either on fire for God and cold to the world or vice versa. Jesus said he will spit you out if you are lukewarm. The choice is God or man. What will they choose?”
