Dear Christine,
I AM WRITING THIS LETTER with tears in my eyes because of what I have been going through.
I have been married for ten years and for nine years my husband and I got on very well. That was until he changed his job and started talking with a young woman who works in the same building as he does.
Christine, he gave this woman our telephone number and she calls and puts down the phone in my ears ever so often.
One day she called the house and told me she was in love with my husband and there was nothing I could do about it.
She proceeded to tell me some of the places they go together as well as how many times a week he sees her.
Christine, I have been praying to God to help me and my situation.
My husband was always a loving, nice person, but he has changed. He still sees after my needs and those of our two children, but he does not seem to be in control of himself.
I do not know what to do. I asked him if he wants a divorce, but he says no. All he tells me is that he needs time to sort out this mess that he has made of our lives.
He still tells me he loves me, but how can he love me and continue to carry on this relationship? He still sleeps at home every night, and that is a consolation.
Christine, I do not know how some women could hurt other women the way this woman is hurting me and trying to break up my family.
I totally blame her for my current situation, and wonder how she would feel if the shoe was on the other foot.
What if she was the wife?
Christine, how can I convince my husband that what he is doing is wrong and that he is hurting me? How can I make him stop this affair?
– Hurt
Dear Hurt,
First and foremost, while you would like to blame this woman totally, your husband must carry some of the blame.
Whether he approached this woman or she approached him, he is to blame as much as she is.
However, what she is doing – calling your home and even speaking to you about her rendezvous with your husband – is wrong.
He, on the other hand, seems to be caught up in a whirlwind of an affair, and you may need to give him the time to weave his way out of it.
The question is, are you willing to hold on and be the good wife while he does this, or do you feel the need to get out of the situation by leaving the environment – at least until he begins to see the light again?
Only you can make this call.
From the look of things, it does not appear that he wants you to leave. Give him the time he is asking you for, but you should tell him how much time you are prepared to give him.
 Not all relationships go smoothly; many mistakes are made along the way. You should not have to fight to keep your husband, but sometimes that becomes necessary.
Continue to love him as you promised the day you said your vows and repeated the words – for better or for worse.
This woman may just be like a passing shower; one minute it’s there, and before you know it, the sun is shining brightly again.
I am sure that some bright days are ahead of you. Don’t let the current storm in your life cloud your vision for new tomorrows.
– CHRISTINE
