PROBLEMS, PROBLEMS, all day long pun Down To Brass Tacks, in de NATION newspaper, wherever yuh turn is problems and no solutions.
De Vendor tired of hearing ’bout problems, mine and other people’s. I want action. ZRs causing mayhem fuh years, and neither dis Government nor de last dealing wid de problem.
Hit everybody where it hurt. When dey get stop by de police fuh breaking de law, mek dem drive into de nearest police station and impound de vehicle fuh three days. Next time six, and so on. I willing to bet a fella now that de problems solve in less than a month, and suddenly every ZR driver is a righteous man!
Why dis gine wuk? Because de owner, de driver and de conductor gine get hurt where every man does feel it, in duh financial testicles! Stop at a place other than a bus stop? Police station fuh three days. Off route? Same ting. Overloading, loud music, reckless driving – ditto!
I remember Rockers Alley dat did allow to fester. People set up illegal shops and soon it was one stink public eyesore. De smell of urine woulda kill yuh sometimes. Right off Broad Street men and women block an entire street and fuh a while dem was untouchable.
Finally, one morning de police swoop down and tear down all de shacks and relocate every man to a location set up by Government and approved fuh de small artisan. Some holler, “Unfair!” and “Infringement of human rights!” But sooner rather than later de dust settle and today yuh free to walk between Cave Shepherd and Norman Centre. De point is this: sometimes decisive action is needed!
Then there is Mr Raul Garcia. I real sympathetic fuh de man. He commit a terrible crime, get a long sentence, serve it but now stateless and so de Bubbadus Government between a rock and a hard place. He went pun hunger strike to bring international attention to he case and get a visit from de PM and a promise to be released from prison into a sort of safe house ’til they find a country willing to tek he.
From all accounts de man is a top class artiste, model prisoner and can support heself. He just need a break. Fuh months now de Government fixing up a safe house fuh he pun prime real estate by de Garrison and he gine be guarded day and night, fed, watered and clothed, light bill, telephone, Internet, DirecTV, medical and on and on and dat could go on fuh years. No longer a criminal, yet he not free to go.
People vex like hell. One man say: “Put he pun a plane wid a parachute and let he go over de country from where he come.”
A friend of mine offer dis solution: “Market, let Mr Garcia hold a couple of art shows and let de people buy de art. Give de man one of dem yachts that get impound fuh drug running, plenty diesel, food supplies and whatever art left back from de sale; accompany he out to sea wid de Coast Guard and when he reach in international waters, tell Raul, ‘Muh brudder, yuh free to go!’”
“Nobody know how he get here in de first place. I sure he know how to handle a yacht. Set de man free and free Bubbadus of de costs and obligations to keep he here! He might end up sailing de world, but Bubbadus woulda solve de problem.” Look how my friend looking fuh de Vendor to get cuss!
I, Market Vendor, gone fuh now. You have a blessed and a wonderful day, yuh hear?
