Dear Christine,
My husband supplies our home with everything we need – except his presence. Christine, he is hardly ever at home.
I have tried to do everything possible to make home pleasant for him and our three children. Still, he spends most of his time away from us.
He says that he cares, but how can a man care for his wife and children yet spend so much time with his friends?
My friends tell me I am lucky that he looks after us, but I am not happy at all. I want to know if you think that I am being unreasonable by wanting to have him home sometimes. Do you?
– Mrs R
Dear Mrs R,
I want to believe that you are not exaggerating. Your husband cannot be expected to be home all the time, but it is not unreasonable to want to have him spend more time with you and the children.
You said you have tried everything possible to make the home pleasant for him and the children, but are you sure that the home is the attraction?
Are you certain it’s not something lacking in yourself – perhaps your appearance?
Or, even though you are fine as you are, he is just a man who loves hanging out with his friends!
Here’s what I think you should really do if everything is fine in the other departments. Rather than focus on the home [men don’t always understand that language anyway], let him know plain and simple that you’d like to spend more time with him. It may not have to be in the home. It could be just out somewhere together.
Marriage should be a partnership in all ways, where husband and wife can share in all things and not only the intimate side of their union.
Have that talk and I’m sure things will get better for you and your family.
– CHRISTINE
