Dear Christine,
I am 20 years old and have a child. My problem is the father of my child is seeing someone else. He says he loves the two of us but that I am the one he is going to marry someday.
A few days ago I told him I was pregnant with my second child and he told me to get rid of it.
Christine, I try to please this man in every way. Sometimes, however, he does not say anything to me for weeks. I work and what I work for can only supply us with food. I don’t want a dress every week but when I do ask him for anything, he takes weeks before he gives it to me. He gives his money to the gamblers.
One night we were at home with our child when the woman came and called him. He left the two of us and went with her. Water came to my eyes when he did this.
I hardly go anywhere, yet he comes and goes as he pleases. I am so worried and stressed out that I don’t know what to do.
Please help me.
– W.R.
Dear W.R.,
I hate to tell you this because I do not want to add to your hurt, but I honestly don’t believe this man truly loves you.
I think he sees you as he does a convenience store. He is there when he needs what he wants from you and cannot do any better.
I also believe you should try loving yourself a lot more. You do not deserve this lack of love and indifference, but the only one who can stop you from getting the bad end of the stick is you.
Either he demonstrates his love (if he says he loves you enough to marry you) in practical ways, such as providing for you and not telling you to get rid of the child. You also need to see him giving up his other girlfriend, or face the fact that you can live and be happy without him.
Dry those eyes and take a good look at yourself and your relationship with this man. Unless he can show his love in ways other than what you now see and experience, he is not worth your tears.
– CHRISTINE
