Dear Christine,
CAN YOU PLEASE give me some advice? I am 19 years old and have an 11-month-old daughter. Her dad and I broke up six months ago because we were fighting a lot, most of it caused by him.
I have been dating a new guy for three months.
Lately, my baby’s dad has been trying to convince me that he has changed and wants me to take him back. I still have feelings for him, but I’m in love with my new friend. I don’t want to lose what I have for a shot in the dark, but what if my ex has really changed? Plus, the relationship I have with my current boyfriend is a long-distance one.
I met him when he came to the island to visit family members. As much as I’d love it to work, I don’t know how to deal with the distance. Do you have any advice to offer concerning my situation?
– M.F.
Dear M.F.,
Don’t allow anyone to mess with your heart.
If you’ve embarked on a new course in your life, keep walking along that path.
I believe that if you were truly in love with your baby’s father, you wouldn’t have fallen for your current boyfriend so fast. Also, if you were in love with your current boyfriend, you would not be debating whether or not to reunite with your argumentative ex because he’s geographically closer. So ask yourself, which is it?
You may not be dealing with your situation the best possible way.
The way most adults deal with extended separations from people they love is to stay busy. They work, take classes, volunteer their extra time to causes they believe in. They do not bounce like tennis balls from romance to romance. And if they have an 11-month-old, they devote themselves to helping their little one go from crawling to walking.
Concentrate on your daughter and on furthering your education.
– Christine
