Dear Christine,
I feel as though I am in one big mess and I am not sure how to handle things right now.
I have been seeing a work colleague for the past seven months now and we get along fine. I am fully aware that he already has a girlfriend in a long-distance relationship and that they have been together for the past three years.
Our relationship started out with us being just good friends, then things got physical, before turning into something more emotional for us. We have been expressing our love for each other in many different ways, and I truly want our relationship to last.
However (and perhaps understandably), this guy is having a hard time parting with his girlfriend. She has been overseas for the past two years and he is uncertain as to when or if she will be returning home.
Do you think I should just walk away or stay with the hope that things will work out for us?
While I am happy when I am with him, it is always heartbreaking when I catch him speaking (or texting) with his girlfriend. Perhaps I should not have gotten involved in the first place, but the love I have for him is genuine. He keeps saying that he wants to be with me, but I can’t see this happening in the near future.
I am in doubt whether I can handle his decision if he chooses to be with his girlfriend. I do not know what to do or how to handle the situation. Can you help?
– W.B.
Dear W.B.,
My advice would be to walk away while you still can. If he truly wants you, he will come after you.
As I see it, he may be physically attached to you, but still emotionally attached to his girlfriend of three years. If he truly loved you, he would have ditched this other relationship from the time you two started seeing each other. Rather than do this, he is allowing you to fulfil his physical desires.
If you want to be in a monogamous relationship with him, tell him how you truly feel about him and issue an ultimatum. However, be prepared to be on your own.
– CHRISTINE
