Sunday, April 14, 2024

DEAR CHRISTINE: Pesky ex-boyfriend needs to disappear


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Dear Christine,
I am a 15-year-old (I will be 16 in March) who wants to hear what you have to say about my situation.
Four weeks ago, my “close male friend” of about six months decided to break up with me.
Since then I’ve discovered that he is texting and seeing other girls, including a student in his class, who used to be “my best friend”. That hurts, but she has told me that while he has been texting her, she is not interested in him.
He has a younger brother ho keeps me informed about whatever he does and so I am often bombarded with the names of those girls he is talking to, or I’m told where he is at any given time.
I really do not care because I do not want him back in my life. Yet, during the past week, he has started to text me. In fact, one minute he is talking me down and the next minute, he is asking me if we are truly no longer an item.
He is 17 years old.
Christine, I know if I take him back, he will be okay for a few days, then out of the blue he will start doing his foolishness all over again, telling me he does not want me and he cannot trust me.
I have never given him reason not to trust me, but he seems to have insecurity issues. In fact, I wonder if he has a mental problem, because he says and does weird things.
I want him out of my life, totally. What should I tell him when he tries to force his way back into my life, even though I want for him to disappear altogether?
– “Pia”
Dear Pia,
If you are having a problem getting this pest out of your life, have a talk with your parents about the situation and ask them to have a talk with him.
I know there is a possibility they may not even know this young man, but in your current situation – especially when you want for him “to disappear altogether” – you should let them in on the secret, if they are not aware.
It is clear that you do not feel good – loved, respected or heard – from this boy, so also do the following: request that he loses your telephone numbers and forgets your name; remove his number from your cellphone, or change his name in your phone to “do not answer”.
After you’ve done these things, don’t look back or turn back. Keep going forward and stay focused on your schoolwork.


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