Dear Christine,
About four years ago I went through a period of cheating on my wife. I don’t know why, but it’s over now and neither my wife nor my family ever knew about this.
One of my close friends tells me that he thinks it would be good if I told my 17-year-old son about it as part of his sex education.
He says every father should teach his son about “the other women” and how men relate to them. What’s your view?
– P.A.L.
Dear P.A.L.,
Quite frankly, I do not think your friend’s advice is sound. Adolescents and teenagers are often very disturbed when parents tell them stories which have sexual overtones. Parents who talk about their exploits or sexual adventures to their children are destroying an image the child needs to hold on to.
Many young boys learn to treat women with love, tenderness and respect by watching how their fathers treat their wives and mothers. If they realise their fathers do not respect the women in their lives, they too will perhaps relate to women the same way.
Your son needs to be able to look up to you for guidance. He does not need you as a pal who confides intimacies – especially, not of the sort you’ve experienced.
– CHRISTINE
