THE TELEVISION IS on a cartoon channel and Kendan, six, is on the floor eating noodles, while Kamiyah, three, sits on her small stool while her hair, which is in two cute puffs, is plaited by grandma Heather. Michael directs the EASY team into the sitting area where he opens the windows which overlooks a beautiful garden.
The family is the Gonsalves, and Michael, 55, is the patriarch. The family had just returned from church which, Michael explains, is an “every Sunday affair”.
“We go as a family. When Naomi has to work then it’s just us and the grandkids,” he said.
Naomi, 29, is mum to son Kendan (meaning strong and serious) and daughter Kamiya (delightful) and she is Michael and Heather’s older daughter. Their younger daughter, Simone, 27, lives in Seattle with husband David.
The Gonsalves clan all live together in the huge family house in Halcyon Heights, St James. Naomi and the kids lived in a bottom apartment but when they got the opportunity to rent it out they moved upstairs to live.
“I love having them up here”, said the grandparents, with granddad Michael adding “they are my two babies. It is a most rewarding experience. I don’t have the same responsibilities . . . I can give them over to their mother when they become a handful but it is a joy to be around them,” he said laughing. “I am looking forward to seeing them growing up to be mature adults too.”
Just as he talks glowingly about his two grandkids, he lights up an extra kilowatt when talking about his two daughters and there was a lot of ribbing and laughing during the interview, with Naomi sitting in on occasion and mum adding her two cents from the kitchen where she was making her own seasoning with a food processor.
“I brag about them constantly. They are my pride and joy,” Michael said.
Dad describes Naomi as “easy going, like me, playful, very giving and a great mum to her kids . . . that she gets from her mother”. Simone is “very grounded” (says sister Naomi) and a “serious person”, says dad, again adding “more like her mother”.
Working in the insurance field for 35 years, Michael has been married to Heather for 32 years (they celebrated that anniversary on June 12).
He speaks proudly of Naomi, at age 19, and a group starting a feeding of the homeless programme in Bridgetown, a charity called Street Lamp Ministries. Now that Naomi has her hands full with work and can only go sometimes, her parents diligently cook and provide the meals every last Thursday of each month.
Naomi has been a massage therapist at Sandy Lane for the past eight years, and is a past student of Ellerslie and The Lodge, where she went to do her A levels. “Dad was very happy when I got in as he is a Lodge old boy,” she said laughing, while dad proudly shows off his school band.
Naomi was supposed to be an architect, having professed love of that field from first form and during summers worked in a couple of firms for hands on experience. But fate would turn the tables and her hands would instead work to heal and help.
As the story goes, the family had an elderly lady as a tenant living in the bottom apartment who had arthritis and her feet were so swollen, that she couldn’t move them much less to walk. Trying to ease the discomfort, Naomi volunteered to rub her feet.
“I worked on both legs for an hour each and at the end she could wiggle them and move them. She was so impressed and told me I had healing hands.”
Naomi realised that she had a gift and felt she could do more with it, but tackling dad was another matter.
“I was frightened to ask him if I can switch because I had already done my CXCs and we had put so much into being an architect.”
“I told her do the course at the Polytechnic and we will look at it after that,” dad said.
Naomi passed the course with flying colours and was awarded the Best Practice certificate. She then went to Trinidad for a year to do a diploma in massage therapy and has never looked back.
Michael says Naomi has overcome a lot to be where she is, after having a rough time at school before being diagnosed with dyslexia at “a very challenging time”.
“When she was at primary school we realised she wasn’t reading properly but the school said she was alright. We had her tested and found out she was dyslexic.”
Dad said they moved her to the Rock Christian Primary school and she was taught by a teacher who dealt specifically with children with various challenges. She also attended the Caribbean Dyslexia Centre as a student. Naomi sat the 11-plus exam and got additional time to complete it.
“I told her do her best and whatever she did was good enough for us. She passed for Ellerslie and that was OK. Despite the difficulties she also got six CXCs and did CAPE.”
With two children, it’s fair to say there will be two different personalities: Naomi was an avid footballer who was on her schools teams while Simone was a book worm and never wanted to leave the home.
“It’s so funny that Simone didn’t even like to travel and when we took family vacation she was the first who wanted to return home and now she is living overseas for the past five years,” said dad, chuckling.
Simone met husband David while they were six years old and a bond developed that led to marriage.
“They went to Combermere together and wanted to get married after graduating. I put my foot down and said get your degree first,” dad said.
Simone got accepted into The University of the West Indies and David got accepted into a school in Florida. He was invited by Microsoft to work in their summer programme and had to move to their head office location. Simone again wanted to follow the love of her life and dad again put his foot down.
With a degree in Spanish on her CV, Simone moved to Seattle and a wedding was finally planned.
“Now they are married I am waiting on her to add to the grandkids pool,” he said laughing. Michael and his wife were constant figures in their children’s lives. In terms of responsibilities they were shared by both parents but because of dad’s work he was more flexible with his schedule so “I was more their chauffeur. Picking them up and dropping off. They also spent time with grandparents.”
Dad was quick to point out though that mum “was the greater disciplinarian. They could run rings around me but pull up their socks around mum. But I must admit we never had any problems with them.”
He laughs at the memory of mum being upset after a not too pretty picture appeared of the girls in The Barbados Advocate when dad was left in charge when mum had to travel.
“I plaited their hair and took them to the Garrison to watch horse racing. The instructions were going out clothes on the left, home clothes on the right.”
Needless to say the mix-up with the clothing was innocent but Heather, pausing as she remembered the incident said, “Let’s put it this way . . . I wasn’t very pleased at the picture.”
In the midst of all that love and joy is a cloud of sadness as the parents spoke of the missing link that would have made the family even stronger: son Daniel who passed away 15 years ago.
“We didn’t want to know the sex of the babies for each pregnancy but each one we expected a boy and had picked out Daniel as his name,” said Michael, adding that when the first girl was born they named her Naomi. At the second birth, it was another girl and she was named Simone Daniel.
Then the boy they were hoping for was born.
“It was so painful and still is . . . that the boy you waited for so long was taken so quickly. He was two weeks premature and picked up an infection in the hospital. He died after two weeks but God is good. We have two wonderful daughters.”
Michael is revelling in his role as dad and now granddad and said he is humbled each day to spend time with them. With Simone away he Skypes and Whatsapps her everyday.
“All I want for them is to have strong faith in God and what we taught them to continue living and doing. Be responsible adults, stand on their own feet and look after themselves.
“My biggest fear is that they go before me and I don’t get to see them accomplish all their dreams.”