Dear Christine:
I HAVE a major problem on my hand and I need your advice as quickly as possible.
Here goes: I recently met this young guy who is so unbelievable. Not only is he very “mature” for his age, but he has a great sense of humour, is very considerate, sweet, charming, loving and has the brains to go with it.
We attended college together, but never got the chance to get to know him well – other than the casual “hello” and “what’s up?” Back then, we moved in different circles.
Now, he tells me he’s infatuated with me and can’t stop thinking about me. He says he prides himself on being in control, but when he’s with me he feels completely out of control.
We really don’t get to see much of each other, he is now at university. I work part-time and the rest of my time is currently spent completing a thesis and babysitting some nights.
He tells me all the time I have nothing to worry about because he would give me anything I want. He buys me beautiful gifts.
There is only one thing that troubles me. He has a girlfriend. He has been with her for five years. I know he loves her, but I wonder how that can be if he comes around to see me. He says he’s working on breaking it off with her, but he has to take it slow. Last night he said if everything is “meant to be” it will happen, and to just follow my heart.
Christine, I’m trying not to, but I’m starting to fall hard for him. I told him I didn’t want to share him. He says he totally understands how I feel.
Should I continue seeing him and wait to see what happens, or break it off now?
– C.F
Dear C.F,
I want to believe that you are a smart, intelligent, young woman. If he is not being completely honest with his girlfriend of five years, why should you stick around waiting to see “what happens”?
As long as he can keep you in the wings, he’ll do so.
If he is as nice as you believe him to be, then he should be honest with both of you.
Find out what or whom he truly wants by asking him, then live with whatever answer he gives.
That way you won’t have to be on pause waiting to see how things will turn out.
– CHRISTINE
