DEAR CHRISTINE, It is now three years that I have been seeing one man every night. When we first met we used to talk about getting married, but so far nothing has taken place to make me think it will ever happen.
At first he did not have a steady job, but now he has been working at a job that pays well. I also work for a good salary. Because of this I asked him his intentions and his reply was “I not sure”.
He says he wants to be absolutely certain before he gets married as so many marriages seem to break up.
I would think that after seeing someone every night for three years you should know whether they would make a good partner or not.
I am beginning to feel that he comes to see me or we go out together just because he wants company and that he has no intention of getting married. Should I finish with him or not?
– M.W
Dear MW:
Marriage is a serious step and people whoare getting married should give the matter careful thought. In marriage, one takes on a lifetime partner.
Just the same, I agree with you that three years should be sufficient time for a man to decide whether he wants to get married or not.
If after all this time he cannot make up his mind, then it would be reasonable for you to be free at times to go on other dates if you desire to do so. You will have to decide if you want to end the relationship completely.
However, let him know that under the circumstances you’d prefer if he did not see you every evening. Such a decision on your part could well help him to consider getting married.
If he still wants to remain carefree then you could just as well end the relationship now, rather than throw away a few more years on him.
– CHRISTINE
