THEY WERE BOTH looking for love and praying God would bring that special person into their lives. He did through the social media dating site Christianmingle.com.
The story of 63-year-old Barbadian businesswoman Sonia Ostler, [formerly Harrison] and 68-year-old semi-retired Canadian pastor Ken Ostler’s love life is far more interesting than one could imagine.
The two were married on May 18 last year; and, according to Sonia, the honeymoon has not ended.
Chatting with them recently at their residence in Christ Church, there is no doubt theirs is a special bond. They both lost their spouses of many years, but were not prepared to live solitary lives.
Sonia, the owner of Sani Services Limited, was bent on knowing that the man she would eventually marry must be a deep, passionate lover of God. Ken, a retired pastor, was searching for a similar kind of woman – one who loved God immensely.
Sonia lost her husband about three years before she met Ken who was a widower, having lost his wife about 18 months prior to meeting Sonia.
For Sonia, dreaming to meet that special someone started when she attended a church retreat and saw a husband and wife team ministering.
“I thought it was good and that maybe God had somebody out there He would provide for me to work with in ministry.
With that in mind, she signed up on Christianmingle.com when she was in Canada visiting her daughter Kristy.
Ken too was searching the website, but he was becoming frustrated at the prospect of not finding someone.
“My friends knew I was looking for someone. I would pray and remind God if He had that special someone for me, but all He kept telling me was to wait. I . . . got frustrated with Christianmingle.com and decided to close down my account,” he said.
Around the same time in Canada he was thinking about coming off the popular North American website, Sonia in Barbados went online and hailed him. The rest became history.
“I was getting ready to shut down when this person said ‘Hello, Journeyflight. How are you? Journeyflight was my name on Christianmingle.com.
“I responded, but what got me interested in Sonia was what she said after. She told me, ‘if you are not a born-again Christian and making Christ the centre of your life, I don’t want to have anything to do with you’.
“I knew then this was someone special.”
The two felt a strong online connection and started communicating through messaging, WhatsApp, Skype and the telephone.
A few months later, it came time for Sonia to travel to Toronto to visit her daughter Kristy. It seemed the perfect time to meet Ken, and so they arranged to do so at the airport in Toronto.
“I was not hesitant. We were both excited at meeting each other. I supposed in the back of my mind that he looked and sounded nice, but I was wondering if we would click when we saw each other,” Sonia said.
For Ken: “I was a bit nervous but we prepared ourselves. As soon as I met her, she embraced me.”
As they kept communication channels opened, Ken realised that he loved this woman.
“It did not take long. I fell head over heels in love with her. When I met her that night I realised the attraction was there.”
During that month in Canada they both got to know each other better and by the time Sonia was ready to leave Canada, plans were being made for Ken to visit and stay in her cousin’s home, also located in The Villages At Coverley.
However, there was some negative feedback, as they both came under great scrutiny from their grown children – his two sons and Sonia’s two sons and daughter.
“We went through a long process before the children accepted us. They lectured us and were acting as though we were the children and they were the adults,” Ken said.
After visiting each other back and forth, Ken proposed to Sonia in October, 2015, while they were sea-bathing at Accra Beach.
According to Ken, “it was a casual kind of proposal”.
I said to her: “We are going to get married, aren’t we? She asked if this was a proposal; so I asked her, ‘Would you marry me?’. . .”
Of course, her answer was yes, but they decided not to tell family members they were engaged.
“He proposed in October, but we kept it from the children. They only found out in January, 2016.”
The two were married on board the Carnival Fascination cruise liner by Sonia’s pastors Steve and Shelley Moore, and Nicky Marshall of the Living Room ministry.
From there they enjoyed a romantic one-week Caribbean cruise, which they felt was over far too quickly.
“We’ve all grown closer and it’s a good, caring relationship that we have. The children are totally behind us now. Everything happened so quickly, but at our ages who can take time to wait?” Sonia said with a smile.
“From the moment we met we sensed a calling from God to serve him together. We felt God was using us as a team to minister together. We are still praying about the ministry and where God will take us from here.”
In the meanwhile, they have started a prayer ministry and assist with leading a Christian cell group.
The two have also started to spend the winter season in Barbados and the summer months in Canada.
This is no problem for Sonia who lived in Canada for nine years and has a Canadian passport. However, she admitted to missing her grandchildren when she is away.
They both feel blessed in their marriage.
“God has drawn us together into a close relationship. We sense his leading and guidance in our walk with Him, the Christian community and our own family.
“Christianmingle.com was just the opening of the door because both of us were praying for the same thing – a mate.”
Ken has grown to love Barbados.
“It was a transition, but the friends I have met have made me feel at home. Barbados is a wonderful nation.”
In April the two will be packing their suitcases to head to Ken’s home in Orangeville, Ontario, returning to Barbados later in the year to continue their journey of love.
