SOME WOMEN WHO are treated unfairly by men deserve their plight because they knew beforehand what the man was like, but still got involved with him anyway. This is what I’ve seen most of my life.
Besides that, I was involved with a woman who left me and ended up with a beater. It was only after the licks started that she appreciated what she had in me. But by then I no longer wanted anything to do with her.
Though this incident took place about 20 years ago, I can remember it as clear as day.
I was 24, young, strong and handsome. I met this woman one evening when I was running on the beach. Her foot struck a rock that protruded out of the sand just enough to inflict damage to the toe of an unsuspecting barefoot runner, but not enough that one’s eyes could discern it from the sand.
When she stumped her toe she shouted out in pain, and as I was close by I went to her assistance. As her big toe had a direct collision with the stone, the skin to the front was cut while the nail had broken. It looked like a bloody mess and she was crying. I lifted her up as she could not walk properly, put her in my car and took her home nearby.
I popped in the next evening to see if she was fine and we started talking. From there the friendship gradually developed and I started thinking that maybe something was possible. What had me anxious though was the way she used to communicate with me. Sometimes I used to hear her twice a day, then on other occasions a week would pass and I would not hear her (cellphones were not widely available then). And in those times when I went unannounced to her house, her mother would always say she could not come to me.
That state of affairs went on for about three months. I used to try to get her to talk about whether there was someone in her life, but she told me that was not my business, so don’t ask.
Just my luck
With all of this happening I gradually began to lose interest because it was clear there was someone else in the picture. But just when I was planning to blank her, she called me up and asked me to take her to the Drive-in. Afterwards we drove to the beach near her house as she suggested. then we had intercourse.
Since I never expected to do anything like that I was unprepared, so I did not have a condom. But she had and we used it. For the next week and a half we went out every evening either for a drive, to the cinema or Drive-in, or to get fast food, and on every occasion we ended up in the same spot on the beach and had sex in my car.
I could not believe my luck. A nice-looking woman who had a job, never asked me for anything, and was only interested in making out – wow!
But as the saying goes, “sweet life don’t last too long”. Just as unexpectedly our intimate relationship started, it ended. I had not heard her for two days so I passed by her only to be met by her mother. That night she called and told me she never wanted to see me again – just so. I could not believe it. I called back to get an explanation from her but she got nasty on the phone, so I decided to accept my loss and move on.
I never saw that woman until about three months later at the beach while I was running. She was with a certain married man and it was clear they were a couple. I couldn’t believe that she would leave me, a single man, and choose him.
Anyway the next time I saw her was about 12 years later in a supermarket. She had put on a lot of weight and really looked old for a woman in her mid-30s. She smiled with me and asked how I was. I told her I was great, but she did not seem to be. My response clearly caught her off-guard because she just stared at me. Clearly I was spot-on with my remark.
To make a long story short, she told me she had two children for the married man, who was still with his wife after promising he would leave her. She said things were not that good with them because he had grown older (he had to be around 60 then) and had become very jealous and possessive. That had led to him hitting her sometimes.
Also, he had developed diabetes and this was causing him a number of health challenges which he sometimes took out on her with his fists. Because of this she wanted to leave him but could not as she had his children to consider.
Immediately I suspected he had erectile dysfunction and was scared his young woman would stray.
By then the tears had begun to flow down her cheeks. She apologised for how she broke up with me and asked me to forgive her. She added that she often thought about me and wondered what her life would have been like if she had chosen me instead.
I can’t say that I would have married her, but the fact that I, too, often thought about her suggests I did love her. For sure, though, the way she blanked me left me forever wary about women and I never married because I could not trust anyone afterwards.
This incident just goes to show how some women deserve the plight they’re in, because she left me for a man old enough to be her father who was married. To me she doesn’t deserve anyone’s sympathy.