Monday, April 22, 2024

Moving too fast after a year


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Dear Christine, I AM 31 years old and have been seeing this man for the past year. Everything was going good between us and we even discussed getting married.

Three weeks ago, out of the blue, he told me that he felt we were getting “too serious” too fast and we should start seeing other people. This has left me feeling hurt and cheap because I invested so much of my time into the relationship.

I still cry from time to time and it has even affected my work. I have to deal with members of the public and my job requires my full attention.

I cannot think straight at all. I actually feel depressed and I have lost much of my appetite.

I call his number several times just to hear his voice – then just hang up. I call at his workplace because I know he does not have



caller ID there.

I feel humiliated that he would dump me the way he did and I want to know how I can get him back.

H.D. Dear H.D., There is no magic wand to wave to make this man take you back. From what you’ve written, it is clear that he wanted out of the relationship. You need to face that fact and remember that it takes two people to make a relationship work.

I understand your pain, hurt and humiliation, but you must tell yourself that you deserve better. If he could dump you as he did, do you really think that he is the man for you?

Take a hold of yourself and your emotions. Stop being so obsessed with him and stop calling his workplace. I am sure he knows it’s you.

Take time to heal. Stop the crying and try doing things that will keep you busy.

Socialise more. Go out with your girlfriends and cherish your job.

This man is not worthy of you, so stop thinking of ways to win him back. Move on.



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