Monday, May 6, 2024

DEAR CHRISTINE – My husband is a cheater

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Dear Christine,
There is clear evidence that my husband has disrespected our relationship. I had an uneasy feeling that something was not right between the two of us lately, which drove me to snooping around. 
I have found myself checking voice-mails, text messages, emails and Facebook and have stumbled onto what I have been looking for. But now that I see it, is this truly what I wanted to find? 
Emails of conversations with another woman that is obviously more than just a platonic friend, even pictures, meeting dates they have had. What do I do? Should?I approach him about this?
I have since found out that this lady works in the construction industry and my husband is a contractor. I know he cheated. Now what? – UNSURE
 
Dear Unsure,
You have found exactly what you were looking for, so now you have to deal with the consequences.
I’m surprised you did not give thought to what action to take if your suspicions proved correct. When one pursues such matters, you need to have a plan if the worse comes to the worst.
What concerns me though is why you thought things were not good between you and your husband, and if you told him this and sought some way to improve your relationship before snooping around. If you did not, it would suggest a lack of adequate communication and even trust issues between you which need to be addressed.
I would advise you to speak to your husband about your concerns. Do not accuse him of anything, even though you think you have proof. Just let him know of your concerns and what you fear may be happening. 
If he is in denial, then let him know what you have found out, but stress what is important for you is how the two of you can improve your relationship. Here I am assuming this is what you want. I hope this helps.
– CHRISTINE 

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