IF YOU WANT TO SEE the true side of a person, apart from planting a hidden camera, get into a vehicle that they are driving.
I’ve seen some of the most mild-mannered people under these simple circumstances transform into the Incredible Hulk minus the green. Clarke Kent used the telephone booth to become Superman, but right before your eyes drivers use their vehicles as a cover to take on a different personality. I am, to be honest, no different and I’ve suffered as a result of my action or someone else’s while on the road.
Once I was driving with a friend who I thought I knew very well. Then a driver performed some sort of funny manoeuvre guaranteed to cause an accident, that is, provided that the other driver was just as much of a novice as he. My friend stuck his head out the window and let the expletives fly.
I looked on, bewildered twice. Was this the same kind, accommodating friend, and did the English language really contain such words?
Once a friend of mine pulled up behind a driver at the traffic lights, put the car in Park and ran up to the offending driver to point out his transgression.
The startled driver, after getting over the initial shock, just stared straight ahead at the lights. My friend returned to the car and I feared for the safety of the other drivers after that. But it wasn’t too long before we arrived at our destination. I took another ride back. It was one thing to hurl insults but another to enter into an actual confrontation. You never know where that might lead.
There have been some uncomfortable moments where, after a run-in on the road, the drivers end up side by side at the lights and after they blow off that initial steam, nothing more is said.
I’ve been in situations where the words “idiot”, “joker”, “fool” and “public nuisance” liberally rolled off my tongue if I suspected that someone had not exercised proper judgement in using the roadway. My body parts remain on the inside though. There have been other times when I was the subject of rude gestures.
I have been trying to figure what makes a person change once they get behind that wheel. It is the most befuddling thing.
Experts have labelled some of the more extreme cases as “road rage”, but really that does not explain what accounts for a driver giving impetus to the Jekyll and Hyde theory. That theory supposes that within us all there is a good side and an evil side but the latter must be kept in check so that good can prevail.
This is a condition that we’ve been warned about in The Bible. It speaks to casting off the old man or former habits in favour of the new, better way of living. However, we are constantly reminded that it is not an easy thing to take the narrow road. It is easy to get offended and react but harder to keep a still tongue and maintain the peace.
It is better to arrive at your destination calm rather than all riled up.
I’ve found a way to dissipate the tension but it is not foolproof. If I am at fault, I’ll look sorry and sometimes that will head off any aggressive behaviour. But I tell you if that driver is in full flight, no amount of looking sorry or smiling will pacify him. It’s best to drive on and not repeat the foolishness.
• Antoinette Connell is the DAILY NATION Editor. Email [email protected].
