Well, boy, Crop Over celebrations now in full swing wid all the tents, fetes, merriment and food; oh, and I almost forget, the confusion or what duh does call controversy.
Huh! As far as dat is concerned, this year was no exception; year after year, if it aint one thing tuh make the place confuse, it does be the next.
But I gine tell ya something though, and it aint got nothing tuh do wid secular or religious, church or the world, Christian or non-Christian, sinner or saint, nutten so; I know who I am. I just used tuh love tuh go and stand up long side the road just tuh admire the creativity, beauty and colour in the costuming.
I, being a very creative person myself, found dat tuh be one o’ the most beautiful parts of the whole Crop Over celebrations after duh stopped the Cart Parade. I wonder why!
But soul, nowadays, apart from a few o’ the bands parading in meaningful costumes pon Kadooment Day, the majority o’ dem does be just there, all the creativity gone through the window.
So in recent years instead o’ going out pon the road wid my umbrella and watching the bands as they come down from the Stadium, I have been staying home and catching some of the action pon the television.
Few bands
That is why I could say dat there are still a few bands where you can actually see what they are trying tuh depict when ya see the different sections, and I repeat, a few.    The majority o’ the others couldn’t care less as year after year they come time and time again wid the women in the same feathers, beads and skimpy bikinis and the men in the shiny pants wid a piece o’ thing round duh hands, neck and foot; nothing different from the year in front or the one before dat: all it does be, is just colour.
And listen, if the narrator wasn’t reading out what it was dat each section was supposed tuh be depicting or representing, you would never know as all ya does be seeing is the same type o’ costumes wid different colours. Dat does make me wonder if the bandleaders think dat all o’ we blind or stupid, if it aint the same things we see just last year. I wonder when duh gine get back tuh real creativity in costuming.
Another thing I wondering ’bout is if the policemen who does line the route tuh make sure all goes well, gine stan up like mock sticks again this year and leh girls in the skimpiest costumes wuk up pon dem?
I wonder if duh gine stan’ up and leh women fly out the bands and jump on pon dem while evahbody stan’ round and laugh. I often wonder why the women doan do dat sorta thing tuh the soldiers.
Wake up
I wonder when Commissioner o’ Police Darwin Dottin gine wake up and see dat the policemen and women who got tuh work pon Kadooment Day, walking all the way down Spring Garden in front o’ the bands, does be walking in heavy, dark pants, black shoes and a hard hat pon duh heads attracting all the heat. I wonder why the police officers in Barbados cahn have lighter uniforms in the summer months.
I wonder if the vendors pon Spring Garden gine complain again this year ’bout low sales if duh doan sell out all o’ duh things or make back all the money duh spend. I wonder who duh gine blame fuh dat; duh gotta find somebody tuh blame.
Wha’ after all, when the people at the Met. Office announce dat we gine get touch by a storm and the good Lord above spare we, duh does blame the Met. Office people fuh making dem spend duh money buying up things dat they didn’t want and then nutten ain’t happen.
I wonder if the calypsonians who doan get past the Semi-finals gine get on bad, do the dog and curse the very judges’ dat dem so carefully selected.
The way how the rain falling now, I wonder if it gine fall and wash out the craft and jewelry people pon the pasture. I really wouldn’t like dat tuh happen because out there does be real muddy and ya doan get tuh browse, buy or enjoy nutten.
I wonder if the police gine stand by another year and watch men and women, especially the young women, lying down in the middle o’ the road pon top o’ one another, wukking up and getting on bad in front o’ all the li’l young children who does be there soaking in everything.
I wonder if the people in authority doan realize dat the children does copy adults and if this is what the so-called adult does do, then nothing ain’t wrong wid dem doing it too.
• Mavis Beckles was born and raised in The Orleans. She has an opinion on everything.
