SCARCE A WEEK goes by without scientists hitting us with the results of some new hot “study”.
Trending this week are: “Waddling like a penguin is safer on ice – okay, no one ever said you’d actually look cool doing it, but at least you won’t bust your tail feathers!” And “Muscular guys make the worst boyfriends”, this from the University of Westminster.
Two questions here: Who funds this research? And, how does one get involved? Brother-in-law Paddy and I would’ve freely volunteered for that study on the health benefits of sleeping naked with a partner. Especially if the “partners” were nubile co-eds. Paddy, who turned 70 this week, laments he’s only in demand for changing light bulbs nowadays.
But scientists also put out useful stuff. A recent study from Japan says that “dogs can spot liars… canines can tell when people are trying to fool them”. This is an ability we voters obviously don’t have and suggests we put our Akitas to assess political candidates. What joy to see a false-promises politician at full gallop with a humongous hound hot on his heels!
Another scientific study has solved the banana paradox: How is it that bananas (which aren’t costly) can be costive; or laxative? The secret apparently is to eat ripe bananas and drink lots of water to digest all that healthy fibre.
More on bananas later. Beatle George Harrison sang: “If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will take you there”. Could this be our problem? We don’t have a clue where we’re going?
“One of my constant preoccupations”, said Sir Roy Marshall, “is the state of the administration of justice in Barbados and, for that matter, much of the Caribbean. To be brutally frank, I think our present system has deteriorated to a point that is embarrassing”. You got that right, Sir Roy!
We accept that sub judice cases shouldn’t be discussed in public. But why are judges and their decisions held in such infallible awe that we can’t analyse and criticise afterwards like how they did with the judge in the Oscar Pistorius case? Instead of hushed “don’t quote me” opinions, why can’t a learned panel review the Myrie case and raise serious questions? Can justice ever improve if we don’t know where we’re going with it?
Back to bananas. We note that they can be either good or bad depending on how they’re used. In this African Awareness Month, my grandchildren are busy preparing African garments and researching Zulus. The plan is to make me a dashiki if enough cloth is left over. “Dashiki” means “shirt” in West Africa. It also means “doggy-style” in Swahili. I hope none of those fellows get ideas.
My question is this: every year we relive the horrors of slavery – black people in chains, being beaten, executed, transported in awful conditions. What message does this send to young black people? Does it inspire them to greater heights, to build on the sacrifice of their ancestors? Does it depress them? Or have no effect.
In a recent column, Suleiman Bulbulia highlighed awful statistics on black people. Of the roughly two million in prison in America, one million are black. Even worse, Olutoye Waldrond told students at Foundation School that black Barbadians still harbour a dislike of their own image. “We see the manifestation of the inferiority syndrome all over again in a nation of mostly black people with notions of racial beauty”. Olu feels the average black Barbadian would “readily jettison (his blackness) if it were possible”.
If that is true, could it be that all the negative harping on slavery is not having the positive effect intended? There is a video showing white indentured servants coming to Barbados, having to build their own shelters, being treated abominably. Very few white Bajans, as far as I know, have any allegiance to their European ancestry or even give that, or how they got here, a second thought. Many Indians landed here penniless; they moved on.
The aftermath of slavery cannot be imprinted in anyone’s DNA. If inferiority exists, someone is teaching it. Bussa’s chains broken; today’s youths in handcuffs. Something’s wrong.
Last thing, I had the supreme honour of being visited this week by true Bajan royalty: good friend, Melville Williams, 105 years old, positive and upbeat! Respects, Sir!
Richard Hoad is a farmer and social commentator. Email porkhoad@gmail.com
