Dear Christine,
I NEED YOUR ADVICE on this problem that I have. I recently had a baby for a guy who did not stay by my side when I needed him most. He turned his back on me when I became pregnant because for some unknown reason, he felt the child was not his even though I did nothing to make him distrust me.
As a result of his actions, I turned to someone else for help.
This guy helped me with all that I needed for myself and the little one. Now after treating me so badly, the real father is coming around to make trouble, saying he does not want his child calling another man “daddy” and he wants me to come back to him.
Christine, I feel if a man can leave a woman in her time of greatest need, she should never have anything more to do with him , no matter what he has to offer.
If he had doubts, he could have waited until the child was born and have blood tests done.
Please tell me what you think about my situation.
– S.P.
Dear S.P.,
I do understand how you may feel about being rejected and left alone just when you needed him there for you. If you do not love him after his shoddy treatment and has put that bridge behind you, it would not be wise to turn back.
The child is legally yours and you are the fittest person to decide who will help you to care, nurture and raise that child. If he claims to be the father, then he should support the child without demanding that you return to him. In fact, he does not have the authority to demand that you do.
I suppose also that since he disclaimed the child he has not even signed any papers acknowledging fatherhood. Love will forgive almost everything but no one can honestly blame you if what you felt for him is no longer there in your heart.
Make sure he has access to the child – as any father should – and that he supports the child. That’s it!
– CHRISTINE
