DEAR CHRISTINE,
YOU HELP many persons who are in need of advice, friendship, relationship and charity.
Please forgive me if I do not have any sympathy for the endless Barbadian women who repeatedly fall into the same trap each and every time.
Almost weekly or two to three a week, it is the same scenario, mistakes and situations. The only differences are that they are by different people with different backgrounds.
Barbadian women get involved with men knowing that the men are already married or in relationships. Or, they start off in a relationship not knowing but discover this after. What do they do? They “choose” to continue in this relationship.
They have a choice to end the relationship, but they choose to stay. A few months later they are hoping the men will leave the wife or girlfriend. They also end up pregnant in the hope that the pregnancy will have a hold on the men.
Each time they repeat this scenario until they end up with four mouths to feed from four different men, no man in their lives and no work as they go into these relationships with the intention of having the man support them.
Half of them have diseases as they don’t wish to comprehend that the same way the man is fooling them, he is also fooling others, which mean he is playing around with all of those other ladies.
If you need to be intimate, use protection. In this day and age, why would you think that in order to have sex and enjoy it, you have to get pregnant? Leave the unwanted babies out of this world; stop bringing unwanted babies into unhappy, unsecured, financially troubled homes, with no father figure who can give the proper structure to have a happy home.
Leave the unwanted baby girls who will grow up in a home with too many “uncles” and stepbrothers and stepfather who will rape them and leave them unstable. Why do you have to do these things?
Barbados is a small island with too many sex offenders on the loose, who are living in cramped confines as families are cash-strapped.
Women keep having a new father for their many children, like they change clothes, leaving the children exposed, vulnerable and to only go to repeat what they know no better.
Get a job! Be your own woman. Enjoy sex, but leave the unwanted babies at God. You don’t want them so don’t bring them into this world; when you make a mistake it is your own. Do not burden your children with your mishaps.
– ANGRY
Dear Angry,
I am in total agreement with your letter and I am sure many others feel the same way you do.
I must state, however, that Barbadian women are no different from women all over the world, and what you are describing is what goes on in many societies, often by a minority.
Sometimes it is hard to tell women that they need to take better care of their bodies; to stop getting children for everyone that comes along, and that they need to be more independent.
They don’t want you to tell them that they are helping to increase poverty because of their lifestyles, or due to the fact that they are bringing unwanted children into the world when they are unable to offer them the necessary financial or even moral and emotional support.
There are many hard-working, independent and intelligent women in our society, but then there are those who live their lives today without a thought for tomorrow; who scheme, plot and commit “acts of indecency” just to acquire the material and fleeting things in life, without giving a thought to the examples they are setting for their children and other youth around them.
Thanks for speaking the truth. I can only hope that those to whom you referred will start taking stock of their lives, starting from today.
– CHRISTINE
