Saturday, May 4, 2024

DEAR CHRISTINE: He doesn’t want me to move in

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Dear Christine,

I have been living with a man for the past six years. He has two sons from a previous relationship and I have three girls, but he is not their father.

His children live at his grandmother who has told the father to look for a place to put them.

He is currently building a house for them to live in and I thought that he would take me to look after the children because he and the children’s mother do not get along.

Right now he lives with me. This has been so from the time we were friends.

Sometimes his children come and spend time with us and so I thought, I would be the natural choice for him to take me  to live in the house to look after him and the children. Now he has told me that he has already asked a girl to look after them.

He is going to pay her to do the cooking and washing for him and the children. He told me he would still come and look for me, because we will remain friends.

But Christine, I feel he and the girl are more than friends. It is for this reason that he cannot let me live with him. I would really like to know why I, who have cared for the children in the past and the person living with him, cannot continue to do so in his new home.

I still love him and he says he loves me. We get along very well. Please help me and answer soon.

– G.B.

Dear G.B.,

I smell a rat and if I were you, I would also have to be suspicious about this man’s attitude over who is to go to his house and take care of his children; something which you have been doing in the past.

In all fairness, however, it could be that he is only providing this woman with a job and while he is friendly, kind and loving to you, I would suggest you try not to get too upset.

If she were to live in the house, that would be a different story and it would take a lot to convince me that there was not an intimate relationship, mixed up with other caretaking arrangements.

Only time will reveal what the real situation is. In the meanwhile, be on your guard, while trying in every way to keep the peace.

– CHRISTINE

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