Dear Christine,
TTHE MAN I am living with left a woman who has some children for him. He did not really want to leave but I was not prepared to have him coming at me and living at her; so he made his choice.
Since this has happened, she is always calling him to tell him something about the children, whom I suspect he cares for more than he thought he would, especially his daughter.
He used to take their support but after the way they beg him to stay when he is about to leave, he started to send it instead. He has not seen her for over a month and I think being apart would have helped him to live away from them, but this woman’s calls seem to upset him.
Now I noticed he gets short-tempered with me and the last quarrel we had, I told him if he misses them so much, why doesn’t he go back. In the past when I told him to go back he would say “never”, but I noticed this time around he did not answer me.
What do you think I should do Christine, because the situation is tense?
– L.J.
Dear L.J.,
Separation however it comes is always a let-down to children, especially if despite dissent between the parents they still feel loved and cared for.
This man seems to have been the kind of father that his children would miss. His attitude suggests that he misses them too.
If he is a really caring parent, he is probably ready to try and mend the breach in the relationship he had with their mother. His leaving her was on your demand, but you also are not happy with what you’ve got.
If possible, encourage him to return home to his children and their mother. After all, if you had not come on the scene there might never have been a separation. You would want the father of your children home, wouldn’t you?
– CHRISTINE