IT HAS BEEN DRILLED into our psyche from the time we were a child that lying is wrong and there are serious consequences if we are caught lying.
The thought of the consequences one faces was the underlying factor that more often than not deterred one from lying. Do not be misguided but all of us would have lied at some point in our lives, even if it was to evade some form of punishment.
Lying has long been a part of our everyday life for it appears we cannot get through the day without being deceived by someone. In many walks of life we would have met so many persons who lie about some of the most mundane things and these lies seem to become second nature to them.
To me these persons can be referred to as compulsive liars or persons suffering from a personality disorder. Persons in these positions carry many faces. Some are bosses, leaders, supervisors, persons in organizations, partners, friends and even children.
Typically, these persons are not sure about who they are and are looking for acceptance by identifying with others. Furthermore, lying seems to allow them to experience a sense of control; they want to feel good about themselves and, not to mention, they are overly concerned with making an impression on others.
These are signs of persons with an underlying sickness and they need help.
Having such a person in your life, be it as a friend, colleague or even a family member, can be extremely frustrating and dangerous, to say the least.
Lying is not only within the adult population but we are seeing more and more children being bold-faced liars.
It is baffling to see so many children engaging in lies for basic, simple things. We believe that children tell the little white lie here and there to get them out of trouble, but a problem really exists when a child is going to lie about almost everything and anything. What makes it more troubling is that some parents explicitly encourage their children to tell lies.
One may asked where did it all started? I say in the home. We need to examine what examples the adults in their lives have been setting. These children had to be nurtured and groomed into becoming young liars.
Parents need to be cognizant that children live what they learn and they will emulate the practices of the adults around them. They learn to lie by observing what their parents do — they become practised in the art of deception by imitating mummy and daddy.
It must be noted that anything that is not accurate is a lie. Regardless of if it was told to make someone feel good, it is still a lie. The bottom line is that a lie is a lie and they have an effect, be it good or bad. Remember, one lie has the power to tarnish a thousand truths.
• Rhonda A. Blackman is an educator, a National Development Scholar and former President of the Early Childhood Association of Barbados Inc.
