Dear Christine,
My boyfriend of four years has suggested we should get married next year.
His argument is that as we already live together and are planning to buy a house, we might as well take the final step and get married.
I have no problem with doing this in principle as I love him very much and would like to live the rest of my life with him.
 Although I feel this way about him I am worried about an aspect of his character which I have spoken to him about.
That is, the way he freely spends money as if there is no tomorrow.
And if he doesn’t have cash, he puts it on his credit card. So he always tends to have high credit card bills to deal with.
This is completely different from how I operate. I believe in saving for everything I want.
 Admittedly, I am not accustomed handling the sums he does, and I never had or wanted a credit card or overdraft facility at the bank. But my boyfriend doesn’t care what the costs of something is; as long as he wants it, he buys it.
Though so far he listens to me and has pulled back from buying things when I tell him we don’t need something, I fear that our different views on spending could cause problems in the long run. How do you think I should handle this?
– D.
Dear D.,
Universally, financial problems are a major cause for discord between couples.
Therefore you are absolutely right to be worried about this matter and should have it addressed now given the very serious implications for your future together.
That’s not to say, though, that you won’t be able to compromise, or your boyfriend won’t be prepared to put you and the prospect of a first home together above his urge to splash his cash. But you need to be sure.
So don’t consider marriage and purchasing a house until you’ve both agreed to set aside an amount of money each month towards your new home together.
Your boyfriend’s willingness to stick to a joint savings plan will prove just how committed he is to your relationship.
It will also make him realise, I hope, that the love of a good woman is something money can’t buy.
– CHRISTINE
