Saturday, May 11, 2024

AWRIGHT DEN: Good news, laughter

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Over the last few weeks, I have been having some very “low” days and I am sure some of you have been as well. Life can be challenging at times and can present many storms that have the ability to slow us down and depress us. Although this may be true, there are so many things we can celebrate and be grateful for as we wait for these storms to pass.
One of the things we do have that we all must be thankful for is laughter and great friends. Laughter brings a sense of calm, relaxation and relief and great friends can also inspire and motivate you.
On Monday evening, a friend sent me an email and it came at the right time as I was in a grumpy mood and it immediately lifted me. I hope if your day or week or month was low that it also brings some joy and laughter to your life
The questions and answers below were from a GED exam students took.
Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab or Sheik wears on his head. Once an Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head.
Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
Q. What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
Q. How can you delay milk turning sour?
A:. Keep it in the cow.
Q: How are the main 20 parts of the body categorised (e.g. the abdomen)?
A: The body is consisted into 3 parts – the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does “varicose” mean?
A: Nearby.
Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.
Q: Give the meaning of the term “caesarean section”.
A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman Emperor? (Julius Seizure)
Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport.
Q: What does the word “benign” mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Thanks Aunt Val for boosting my day and hopefully the day of others.
Since we are in a bubbly and happy mood, I want to invite you to join me in celebrating a great friend, Mr Chad Blackman, a Barbadian who just completed his last exam for his law degree from the University of Essex and on Monday, received the International Student of the Year Award.
Some of his other achievements during his time in Essex include:
• Founding the University of Essex Bar Society in November 2012 (society for law students who aspire to be barristers-at-law in UK) NB: There was already a Law Society in existence, but generally catered to students who wanted to be solicitors.
• Recognised by Head of Commonwealth, Her Majesty The Queen, for contribution to the Commonwealth in October 2013.
• Elected as President of the European Law Students’ Association (ELSA) in Britain (5 000 students). UK arm of ELSA International (40 000) in March 2014.
• Corey Worrell is a former Commonwealth Youth Ambassador.

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