Saturday, April 20, 2024

DEAR CHRISTINE: No longer in love with hubby


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Dear Christine,
YEARS AGO I made a terrible mistake. A man I loved had left me and I was very heartbroken. Then along came the man I am now married to.
Being lonely and sad I found comfort in his attention. I knew I did not love him deeply when he asked me to marry him but I felt that time would have taken care of that.
Well, as I said, I realised as the years went by (three of them) that I had made a mistake. I had hoped also that when our baby came along things would have improved, but they have not.
Now, we hardly speak to each other. When we do, we are short in our speech. I just cannot go on like this and wonder if I should speak to him about getting a divorce. Christine, would this be the right move to make?
– Cathy
Dear Cathy,
I totally agree that you cannot go on like this, but if you’ve made it through the past three years, you should perhaps make a greater effort to save your marriage.
This is not to say that the two of you cannot come to a mutual agreement to go your separate ways. Obviously there is a breakdown in communication, and unless this is mended, your marriage will continue to crumble.
You also said you were not madly in love with your husband when you married him. Perhaps you should have been honest with him and with yourself before you said “I do”.
While it is difficult for me to come right out and tell you to get a divorce, I will suggest that you have a real talk with your husband; get to find out what he is also going through at the moment.
All of us make mistakes in life and many do so when they take that trip up the aisle – especially when it is done for selfish or dishonest reasons.
Have that talk. After that, you’ll know what is the right move to make.


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