Wednesday, April 24, 2024

I CONFESS: Women don’t really want the truth

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WOMEN ALWAYS ASK you to be honest and to tell them the truth. But most of the time they can’t really handle such honesty.

Whether it is little things like how a dress looks on them, if their new hairstyle really suits their face, or if the food is too salty, to big things like if you like their mother, if you “have feelings” for their best friend, or the biggie, if you’re having an affair – they often freak out when you answer them truthfully.

If, for example, you tell your woman that a dress she just spent $150 or more on does not really look that good on her, the first thing she accuses you of is not appreciating her and the effort she makes to look good for you. Then they want to know if you are really saying they are getting too fat, or if you have an eye on some bony young girl.

They just can’t deal with the fact that the dress does not really suit their body type.

The unfortunate thing about such conversations is if you get vex or sarcastic, you are accused of being guilty of one of the things suggested. From there, a big noise is sure to follow.

The bigger questions about fidelity causes even more drama. In fact, sometimes you can come to blows.

Not that you would hit her – because I don’t believe in that. But the truth is that a lot of women “hand fast”, and when they get vex they does want to pick up something to lick down men.

 Not the best policy

 Because of all the confusion that often follows when you level with women about some critical things, I believe honesty is not always the best policy.

I am not saying that you should lie to your woman – no!

I’m simply saying that sometimes it is better to not say anything, or just say what you think she wants to hear for peace’s sake – especially when it is a trivial matter.

I know a lot of you reading this would say that I am wrong to say so. But I would bet that at least once in your relationship, you resisted the urge to tell your partner the truth about a matter because it more than likely would have led to a noise. And you did it because you weren’t in the mood for that as the matter was not that significant.

I said all of that to help you understand why I feel the way I do now and why I broke up with my woman a few months ago.

I finished with her because she could not handle the truth.

I should have forseen it because throughout our relationship, anytime I honestly spoke my mind on a matter which was not eye-to-eye with what she believed, it ended up in a noise.

What happened was that after living together for nearly three years and going through a lot of unnecessary quarrels and drama, I just got fed up.

I still cared for her but I could no longer take living with someone who had stopped taking care of their body and was always fretting about the littlest of things.

What pushed me over the edge was when I tried to encourage her to do some exercises after she had our daughter. I told her we could do them together because I too was putting on a few pounds as I didn’t play football as much.

 Different view

 You would think she would realise I cared about her and wanted us to do things together. No. Instead she saw me as complaining about her weight and no longer being satisfied with her.

I explained that since diabetes ran in her family, it made sense for her to keep her weight down. I even checked the way in which I said what I did to her to make sure I was not being insulting in any way. But no matter what, she felt I was being difficult and unappreciative.

So she stopped having sex with me as often.

Obviously, I asked why she no longer seemed interested, only to hear that I was not interested in her because I said she was fat – something I never said. She concluded that’s what I meant because I told her about exercising.

To make a long story short, everything I said which she had a problem with she twisted it to suggest I was saying the opposite.

So I decided never to say anything, or just say what I believed she wanted to hear. I did that for about two months and during that time we had few clashes, we started having sex again, and she said I was behaving like the man she first met.

She was happy living in a fool’s paradise – one in which the reality of the situation did not matter, and she did not want to deal with the truth.  As I could not live that lie, I walked out on her. And I am happier today.

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