Dear Christine,
MY BOYFRIEND and I are both 19 years old and we are currently studying. Generally we get on well and mix with a friendly bunch of guys and girls. However, lately he has been hinting that we should make love.
I would like to please him although I am not interested in getting pregnant. Would you know if there is a time that’s considered safe to make love?
I really would like to get some information on this matter although I’m not saying anything will happen. But just in case, I would like to know how to protect myself. We have talked about this and he would rather not use anything.
– L.
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Dear L.,
I suppose what you mean about your boyfriend not wanting to use anything means he does not want to use a condom, so the responsibilities of not becoming pregnant rest on you.
The safe period of family planning is not advisable for an unmarried couple who are anxious to avoid intimacy since this needs to be worked out very carefully, over a lengthy period. If you want to have intercourse with your boyfriend, you should go to your doctor or the family planning unit.
I also gather you are considering having sex just to please your boyfriend. If it turns out he is not the one you want to marry, do you plan to go through life pleasing all the men you meet and like in this way?
Apart from moral questions, casual sex carries grave risks.
– CHRISTINE
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