WORKERS AT WHAT can be considered a penile institution in The City are hopping mad after not receiving a pay raise for 16 years.
They say that after the force of darkness took over the company, he persuaded them to drop out of the union while spouting Christianity and worker rights. But from then until now not a single soul has gotten a pay increase. He set up a canteen in the company and opened a clothing account, and swore to clothe and feed the staff instead.
Staff say several calls to the union before and after the fact met with stiff resistance from the union, which chose to do nothing about the situation while continuing to dock their pay for dues.
But he has gone further. After stopping the company’s pension plan for the workers, he has refused to write the insurance company informing them that workers should be repaid their part of the contributions if they so desire or be allowed to continue paying if they wish to activate a new plan. This plan was stopped almost 16 years ago, which is around the time this self-confessed devil worshipper took over the City business.
Workers say their next course of action is the law courts to get what is rightfully theirs from Satan’s imp.
A dog-eat-dog world, indeed
HE KNEW something fishy was going on, but he got the shock of his life when he realised who he was being horned by.
Residents say that they were accustomed seeing him going and coming, but he said very little to them.
But when Simple Simon was heard ranting and raving, they knew that he had found out. The large home in the heart of The City was the scene of the raucous behaviour.
One of his confidants recalled that on a previous occasion he had noticed dog hair on the bed of the non-national, but he did not see, or had never seen a dog at the house. But this night in question when he entered unannounced and hurried to the bedroom, the dog was there, a reasonably big one, cuddled up next to her. And, don’t care what he did the dog would not leave the bed and the woman did very little to help the situation.
She does not have a dog house and therefore could not put him away, but being none the wiser as to whose dog it was and where she got it from, he left a broken man, with his tail between his legs. It was a ruff, ruff experience for him.
By the short and curly
A COMPANY with a short man with curly hair at the helm is moving to clean up its image after undergoing a vicious cycle of attacks on the moral front.
They have hired a new human resources manager and strict rules are being enforced in respect of dress code and general decorum. Uniforms are no longer to be altered to reveal cleavage and shortened to reveal legs.
But staff say that that is not where the problem lies. The problem is the boss, and regardless of whether their uniforms and long or short, cleavage not no cleavage, he preys on them and demands sex, failing which their jobs are threatened.
The short man, who sits on high, needs to be stopped one way or the other, they say. If they could get this assurance from anyone they would be prepared to take out the necessary insurance policy to protect themselves from him.
Van Diesel on the job
THE FUMES from this one have not dissipated as yet and the stench of diesel is still very prevalent. From St Philip to The Pine there is a trail and the scent is strong. The watchman and those who know how it is being done are silent, but the auditors are making a fuss.
But the diesel is unaccounted for and the culprit is still at large. He is a known pilferer and they know it too, but they refuse to act. Some say that he stole while stationed in St Philip at a penal institution, and he is continuing his old ways in The Pine.
Those in the know say that stealing diesel is his side job, and he then resells it at discount prices to some PSV owners.
When the brakes are pulled on this one, “Van Diesel” may end up back in St Philip, but this time, behind bars.