I AM A GIVER and I find great joy and satisfaction in giving to others. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t like gifts and though as you get older you don’t normally expect them, when they are presented, we receive them with joy.
Prior to 2013, I helped many people who were in need: family, friends, colleagues and even strangers. After losing my teaching job in 2013, I wasn’t able to help as I wanted to and I became depressed about it. Before 2013, I would go to the supermarket and while shopping for my family, I would also pick up extra items to share with people I knew were in need.
If I was overseas and I bought for my children, I would pick up for children back home who could benefit. I remember standing in the supermarket one evening with tears settling in my eyes because I couldn’t help as I used to anymore. That season lasted probably a year and it was a very difficult time for me; it felt as if a part of me was ripped away.
Sometime in 2014 I had a revelation that helped me out of this low state. I realised that gifts weren’tlimited only to physical or tangible things but someof the greatest gifts are intangible and can have lasting effects. We often underestimate the gifts of giving time, sharing experiences or knowledge, offering talents, making your home available, and giving encouragement and praying for others.
I make it a deliberate effort to call friends and acquaintances randomly throughout the month just to check in on them, pray for them or encouragethem. I would also send WhatsApp or Facebookmessages at random times also. SometimesI get statements like, “Boy, I thought everyone forgot about me”, “I really appreciate this call’, ‘I needed that encouragement”, or “You are a godsend, you called at the right time”. If on the road, I would randomly stop by a friend’s workplace during lunchtime and take them out for lunch or turn up at their home to give them a shout to see how they are doing.
One morning I stopped by the gas station to get a lentil patty and a drink. On my way down the highway, I said to myself I should check in on “Frank” since he was studying for exams. I drove back to the gas station, got a lentil patty and a gram-burger roll and stopped by his home. When I got to the house he was so pleased I had come as he needed a break from the studies and was really hungry; we had a good talk.
After becoming a husband and a father, I was a bit selfish with my time but over the past few months I have been trying to give more of it to my friends, even if it is just an hour to sit and chat.
Your time, knowledge, talents and so on are allgood gifts to give, but I believe what trumps them all is the gift of being a good example. One of the best ways to help someone is by being a living example they can follow. Purpose in your heart to be a good example as a parent, a spouse, a leader, a boss, in your career, on the job, as a student, an entrepreneur, as a friend and in whatever you do. Never determine your influence by what people communicate to you.
There are people you are influencing who may never speak to you. The examples you setcan be life or death to them. I have some good friends who have never given me any tangible gift but I am so encouraged and inspired by the examples they set. Don’t you find it amazing that we can change the world just by being good examples?
On another note, I want to express appreciation to the leadership and senior staff of the Transport Board who contacted me about last week’s article. They were very professional, understanding and warm in their communication and I want to commend them for that.
