I WAS LISTENING with amusement to a Crop Over song, which inspired my article this week.
The singers Smokey Burke and Bobo captured an essential part of our culture, which is the absolute pleasure that many men get from drinking alcohol.
Keeping it real – many men (and some women) love to drink alcohol in Barbados. I remember a time when Tanqueray gin was popular in many rum shops and then, like magic, tastes shifted to Absolut vodka and now men are calling for Johnny Walker Black. But four beers for $10 will always be the perennial favourite.
I used to wonder what was more important to regular and prolific drinkers – the camaraderie of pelting them back with others or the desire to “feel sweet”. My informal survey of male friends and acquaintances tells me that most men like the “feeling sweet” part as when you are in that state you can say or do things you would not otherwise do, allowing the drinks to serve as a good excuse.
Friends have shared with me showing up to their partners after a drinking session ready and raring to go. Does drinking alcohol make a man a better lover as many men think? What is the real effect of alcohol on sexual health? The short answer both is that it depends on how much alcohol a man drinks and moderation is the key.
People who do not drink will have no idea what I am talking about, but for the occasional drinker like me there is no doubt that a glass of wine or a cocktail can make a man or woman relax their inhibitions, maybe give them a little buzz.
A mojito is my cocktail of choice. But there are no studies that show a relationship between that cocktail and better sexual performance. The cocktail or alcohol is not the reason for great sexual outcomes. Equally good sex can be had with romance and imagination and no alcoholic assistance.
For men who drink heavily, it is important to know that over time heavy use of alcohol will impact your sexual health. For the partners of heavy drinkers there is a lot to deal with. Women have shared their distaste for the smell of the alcohol on the breath and the smell that emanates from the pores. Also for some men there may be a lack of finesse or clumsiness when in a “sweetened” state that can result in less than stellar performances.
The reality is that alcohol is a central nervous system depressant. It is not a stimulant as many people think. Alcohol acts to inhibit or slow down parts of your nervous system that are important for sexual arousal or orgasms. The parts of your nervous system that are slowed as a result of heavy drinking are respiration, circulation and the sensitivity of nerve endings.
Alcohol also dehydrates the body and erections require a certain amount of blood to bring oxygen and greater sensation to the genitals. When large volumes of alcohol are acting to dehydrate the fluids in your body and this combines with suppression of your nervous system, over time it will be harder and harder to get and maintain an erection. So the stark reality is that consuming large amounts of alcohol or long-term heavy drinking causes problems with erections and can lead to erectile dysfunction.
Affordable treatment and referrals are available for erectile dysfunction at Barbados Family Planning Wednesday evening male clinics. There are also a range of experienced urologists available locally. However, whoever you go to is going to ask about the drinking. If you can’t stop or moderate, get help. There is no shame in going to counsellors or Alcoholics Anonymous and people from all walks of life find help.
We at BFPA are not against alcohol use. We are instead for moderation in drinking. Studies suggest that one to two alcoholic drinks per day is moderation. So if you want to have good sex now and well into the future, cut down the alcohol and let your imagination do the work.
